The Best Parenting Advice
As a mama of four girls, I have received my fair share of parenting advice. I have gotten advice from others who are also parents, grandparents, and even from the moms who have never had children. You know, the women who have the perfect non existent children? Aren't they just well behaved?! One thing from all of them alike though is that the advice typically comes from a very loving and helpful place. But from all that advice I have received over the years, what exactly is my best piece of parenting advice for you??
Don't listen to others!
Now don't get me wrong, it's OK to ask for advice from others! I mean, I hounded my own mother with questions...still do. But, do NOT listen to all the craziness around you. Everyone shouting their options of how they think you need to parent. All the do's and don'ts constantly thrown in your face from those who believe they are the most knowledgeable, just block them out. Simply listen to your own motherly (or fatherly) instincts that you were given, that voice inside of your head telling you what is best for your child. You were given the knowledge to best serve your children and nobody else has that, nor can they possibly figure that out.
See, one thing I know for sure having four kids is that ALL kids are different. I have to listen to my motherly instinct to tell me what is best for each of my children. I do not and will not listen to the advice from others....unless I asked for it, from women who can really pass along great wisdom! The same goes for you. You and your spouse should be the only ones deciding what is truly best for each of your children. Nobody will ever know them like you do.
Life is slightly chaotic with children, if you haven't already figured that out...okay maybe a lot chaotic, like some days you want to rip out your hair chaotic. You don't need to be overwhelmed by those who are extremely opinionated. Like when someone tells you how to sleep train. You may not even want to do that! They may try and tell you how to get your kid to learn the alphabet by one year old. Okay Martha, let's not get ahead of ourselves okay?? They may want to convince you what baby item they believe is most important in your house. Yea, not all of us are rich enough to afford that several thousand dollar baby swing. Girl, if you wanna go the old fashioned way and rock that baby in your arms, you do it!
Parenting looks different for everyone. Why? Because all children are different. The two parents may be the same, but none of the kids turn out to be the same. They all have different personalties and different love languages. One child may need to sleep in your bed a bit longer in life because they have nightmares more often. Another may need extra one on one support in school to work through the learning process because large groups may be difficult for them. They may even need different types of attention from each parent. Whatever the differences may be, they are just that....differences.
I am so grateful for my girls. I am grateful that they are not all the same. They are all beautiful in their own unique ways, and I would never be able to truly see that if I was busy listening to everything around me. It is only through that God given motherly instinct that we are able to find and see our children's identities and begin to love them and care for them the best way that suits them. It is through the intimate way we really know them, even when they are tiny little babies, that we are able to know what they need and when they need it.
Parenting is truly rewarding when we begin to let go of what others think or what they might judge us for and focus on how to individually care for our own little ones. It is beautiful to truly know someone, so stop trying to win everyone over and learn to focus on what matters, being the best parent you can ever be!
