Speak Truth to Yourself
As my children have grown up, I have realized just how tough I can be on myself. When those unkind words start spewing out of my mouth, I immediately regret them as I realize my daughters are listening close by. Often times when I am around other women, I notice I am not alone in this harsh criticism as I hear negative words also spew out of their mouths.
Women are strong and we have overcome a lot of obstacles in this world; continually breaking down barriers between us and men. Women are courageous; standing up for ourselves and our rights, even when it seems impossible. Women are smart; becoming professors, doctors, leaders, and even taking charge to make changes for the good in this world. We are tender hearted and we are great at showing love and empathy to those who struggle in areas of their own lives. The one thing we are not so good at though is being kind to ourselves. It is an area we could all use a little change.
Picking Ourselves Apart
Mirrors are great, but I believe they have also become detrimental to women. Every time we come across a mirror, whether at home or out and about, we notice all the things we wish to change about ourselves. We notice the pimple that grew overnight or the dark circles from lack of sleep. We see the uneven skin tones and the extra giggle we’ve gained. We even have the ability to notice the first grey hair on our head as soon as it starts coming in.
We fixate on the things we hate about ourselves, and we figure out ways to make them go away. Tanning helps us feel better about our light skin tones, or makeup to cover all of the uneven blemishes. Working out or dieting helps with getting rid of the giggle, but sometimes becomes an unhealthy obsession. People will even get surgeries to adjust what they don’t feel is good enough for others or themselves.
The more we focus on the things we don’t love about ourselves, the bigger the problem becomes.
The Truth Doesn’t Have to Be Harsh
Awhile back I was sitting in church and I heard something that has since stuck with me. The truth doesn't have to be harsh. They were referring to being truthful to others, in a sense of not always needing to point out the bad in others, but also pointing out the good in others; reminding them of their love and value. It made me think of all the ways I have torn myself apart with lies the enemy has whispered into my heart. I am not pretty enough, thin enough, tan enough, tall enough, or curvy enough in the right places.
With that, I’ve made the realization that we need to speak kinder truths to ourselves, and maybe someday we can begin to believe them.
Kindness
What would it look like if we were kinder to ourselves? Instead of noticing our acne or dark circles, we noticed the joy in our eyes or our smile. Instead of focusing on our giggle, we focus on the hard work we’ve put into eating as healthier. And instead of focusing on our outer beauty, we focus inward on making ourselves the most kind, caring, and loving human beings!
It’s not easy to be kind to ourselves. It’s easier to see the bad within and run with it. What’s not easy is purposefully calling out the good in ourselves, both in our inner beauty and outer beauty. Even though it isn’t easy, when have women backed down from a challenge to change the world? And changing the world starts with the change within.
xoxo
Jillian
